Christianity · Major road intersection · Trust in God

Feeling Steered Through A Major Intersection Into The Direction I Want To Travel

wp-image-920425371Today has been draining at my job, from what many might think would be a good thing for a homeless temporary employee. 

The employer where I have worked as a temporary employee for the past 3 or 4 weeks offered me a permanent position today and wanted to see if I was interested in going permanent for them. 

This was strangely difficult for me as I have lived in a vehicle for the past 8-1/2 months, hoping for a permanent position for quite a long time.  Finally it happens and I can’t say that I’m happy.  I felt like I received a punch in the stomach and it wasn’t too pleasant.

My desire has been to earn a living so that I can afford a decent place to live, but this job isn’t giving me the income that I need to do that.  So when the manager called me into his office to discuss whether I’d be interested in working for them permanently, I was not especially overjoyed.  I was thinking about moving into Christian counseling and had contacted someone about this at an agency near where I’m living, where I stay in a parking lot.

I was getting used to thinking about myself as not being in a basic office job and not hoping to be asked to stay at this office job permanently.  I had resigned myself to moving on after my assignment was up.  I didn’t know it had a few weeks to go since I did not know they were counting all the weeks it took for me to get a physician assistant’s license before I could go back to work for them.  You see, after I worked only a few days, one of their employees asked me to leave.  Politely, but it would be impossible for me to stay under the circumstances of their employees feeling threatened by my not having a pharmacy assistant license.  They said it put their jobs at risk, and also maybe the companies. 

Immediately I left the company, not knowing what I would find fast enough in order to keep the income coming in that I had planned for by accepting that temporary position.  I had to take that box truck driving job, that took 15 hours a night driving across Washington state delivering auto parts.  That was a physically taxing job and I never wanted to do a job like that again.  This is what I had to do in order to hang on long enough financially before the six weeks were up that it took me to actually obtain the license.  That was half of the time of my whole assignment, so it seems like it is ending quickly at the end of the month.  

At the end of this next two weeks, they might buy out my contract, instead of making me wait the 180 days to go permanent without having to buy out my contract with the temporary agency.  Not knowing what will happen, my income has suffered long enough and I’m quite angry about it.  I keep having to struggle so long before I finally get ahead, even a little bit.

I am grateful for the money at this point, but it is not enough to live on.  I know I do not really belong working there; it has become painfully clear that there is something else for me, such as the counseling job I so want to have as I am qualified to do much more than this office job. 

Why be loyal to a company that put me through so much already and I barely survived?  I ask the Lord Jesus to give me the right attitude about this job and what I have to look at to make a better decision for my life than how it has been.

You see, I had taken a different direction, including making plans to start my own business.  As of yesterday I had been investigating working as a therapist at a Christian counseling agency and had communicated by email, and I got an answer from them today.

They wanted more information about the situation I am asking about.  I wanted to work in a Christian agency, earning my hours, even so, going backward from working on my doctorate degree, but knowing that what is in the world does not mean as much to me as sharing the Word of God with people.

However, as a counselor or some kind, I would be doing the work I am trained to do and earning more money than working at a temporary job, if they do not decide to take me on right away as a permanent employee at the office job, and they may not.  Now I am twisted around a bit and seeking what God has to say about my situation, and whether to stay in the office job or not.  They may keep me as a temp for the next three months at the low pay I am getting as a temp, not wanting to pay anything to release me from the contract they have with the temporary agency in order to let me go, so they can hire me right away.  I kinda don’t think so.  Why am I so special that they would want to spend extra money to buy out the contract after letting me hang out to dry for six weeks before I could come back to work for them?

I kind of get the drift from writing this that I should go ahead and make plans to do what I need to do, and not worry about them.  As Jesus once said; 

Let the dead bury their dead: but go thou and preach the kingdom of God. ~ Luke 9:60

To add to my stressful confusion, today a chunk of money was taken from my bank account by the student loan lender which was not supposed to be taken out.  I have been paying another agency every month who has been the intermediary between me and the lender so that I don’t pay anything right now, being without a regular job all this time and living in a vehicle, homeless.  So they agreed.  But today come to find out, they took $126, which I cannot afford.  Since I am behind on my car payments, I have two car payments to pay in the next two weeks.

The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.” ~ Psalm 91:14-16 

I am confounded at the sudden turn of events in both my bank account and my job.  I continue to send up my prayers that I may have the right answer this time and know what to do.  I can take shortcuts right now and ask the Lord to guide my thinking in this and not have to suffer more than I need to.  

Thank you, Lord, for the suffering I’ve done.  I continue to believe and have faith in You.

But the Lord is faithful; he will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one. ~ 2 Thessalonians 3:3 

I know that I am a strong believer in the Lord Jesus Christ and I trust Him completely.  I will not shatter; He will make this work out where I can move forward, hopefully, and finally begin to make progress in getting out of my homelessness.  

Avocation · Christianity

An Answer To Starting A Business: An Office In My Vehicle Is How I’ll Have To Begin

Looking out my windshield as I sit writing this blog post tonight. Photo: sleboeuf @

Today I searched online for a Christian counseling agency near me.  My seeking involves locating an opportunity working as a therapist and becoming licensed in Washington state.  It would not take more than a few years to pass the exams, in my estimation.  I was able to find a few agencies in my area but they do not hire non-licensed therapists.

My angst has been that I could never become licensed through the state of California, not getting consistent supervision hours while I worked as a therapist registered intern.  I skipped over trying to become licensed because it was so hard to get the supervision hours I needed and began working on a doctorate degree in psychology instead.  I taught at a University, where I taught in-class and online college courses in Human Services.  I loved the work but once I left California, there were many reasons why it was next to impossible to find work in my field.

Instead of explaining all the details, I thought today about how I could increase my wages to pay housing costs and begin a business I have in mind that I have begun working on.  Using my skills and education, I feel qualified to start a school.

Housing provides a place to work at a desk.  Living in a van does not give me this opportunity and so I’ve checked around seeking affordable offices to rent but could not find any without commuting into Seattle, a horrible and long commute that seems like a waste of time.  My dilemma now is how to work in a work-space where I can work uninterrupted by children or other people, and be able to work into the night.  I thought of a large church that I want to pursue asking permission to work in.  I could sit in a lobby even to create material and a website.

Tonight I’m in my van parked on the side of the road in a residential area typing this blog post.  My cell phone provides a hot spot so I am able to get online.  I suppose this is a crude office space that I hope is just temporary.  You might say I’ve created a workspace at no cost which fits my budget.  I try to be thankful to the Lord Jesus Christ where I can.  He helps me stay strong and optimizes my resources, He gives me ideas and generally helps me stay at peace.  I don’t have to impress anyone.

Today I am happy to report that I bought a domain name today and have the web host paid for.  I am not going to give the name out at this point but hope to launch this site in the coming weeks.

Christianity · Sound mind

The Promised Sound Mind Given To Christians By The Holy Spirit

s5 big artMany of you may know that I worked as a Mental Health Clinician, a Godless industry, that I do not believe will cure anyone of any “mental illness” they may have.  If you are a believer, you know that satan works to harm us through our minds, primarily. 

When you have God on your side, and are a living, breathing, true Christian, you have the Holy Spirit who guides you and gives you things to think about in order to solve your problems.  That is not all He does.  He is God and will teach you from the Word what you should be thinking.

When you have satan in charge of your life because you do not believe in Jesus Christ, you become under the auspices of the demonic realm.  It may take some time to come out if you have not been a Christian earlier in your life, such as those like myself who were raised in atheist families.

If you know what the demonic realm can do to a person, especially striking the mind with demonic thoughts, you know what I mean when I say that Christian counseling is the way out.

Not only will you find a friend in the Lord Jesus, but He will begin to fight your battles for you;

And the LORD, he it is that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed. ~ Deuteronomy 31:8

With him is an arm of flesh; but with us is the LORD our God to help us, and to fight our battles. And the people rested themselves upon the words of Hezekiah king of Judah. ~ 2 Chronicles 32:8

He promised us to have a sound mind;

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. ~ 2 Timothy 1:7

Biblical counseling is best.  Where in mental health literature can you find these and other truths of Christ? 

I believe mental illness can best be served by Christian counseling.  Of course, clients and patients being treated for their mental illnesses must believe Jesus Christ is Lord.

To obtain life with inner peace, no matter what the circumstances, walking in Christ is the better answer.

Avocation · Christianity

My Dream Job: Unexpected Answer From God

Today I’ve decided upon a company I’ll start on my own; that of lay-counselor and teacher of adults.  I’ve done both lines of work, and am very excited at the ideas coming across my mind which I believe are God-inspired.


As you may know, I’ve been struggling with finding sustainable income, and today I’d been thinking of working in Seattle at a better rate of pay.  In my van it would mean finding a parking area that I would transfer to and most likely take the bus into downtown Seattle.  

I was contacted with the request to answer a temp-to-permanent office job that pays well above what I am paid now, as a temporary employee, and thought, “it’s time that I earn more money, God, so I can find a better place to live”.  

It hasn’t been long after that when I decided to found a business where I could use my counseling and teaching skills and create my own company that I could do on the side while I continue with my job I have now which I think will go permanent.

I live local to my job so would not have to commute on a bus for an hour, like I would if I applied for the job offer in downtown Seattle that I received today in an email.  Using the time I would not have to commute would give me the time to build a company.

Thanks to the Lord Jesus Christ!  I have found my answer.  It is by God’s will that I do this job, using my skills and training and following God instead of going back to an old career that is Godless and that I don’t believe in.

May you have the things you dream about come true for you, in the name of Jesus!


A Walk To Think

Photo credit: sleboeuf (at in Kirkland, WA.

I’ve been feeling the refreshment of the Spirit lately, feeling better and stronger of mind.  More at peace.

I’m praying over my housing situation as well as my job.  I don’t know what’s in store for me but my trust in God, the Lord Jesus Christ, keeps me at peace.

Sunday I went for a walk in a park I’ve never been to before and it was very beautiful and refreshing.  

Here’s a video:   A nature walk in the park: Kirkland WA

There’s something I want to do in life and I can’t put my finger on it just yet; I know I have the talent and skills to teach, but am I ready to teach anyone the truth of the gospel?

There is something inside of me that wants to share the Word, but I can’t decide what venue I will choose to do it in since I’m not the type to just start talking to someone, like a stranger, about the Lord Jesus Christ when I’m out and about during the day.  In fact, I don’t even like strangers as I’ve written about here in earlier posts so that wouldn’t work out too well!

I’m sure I will be asked to work longer at my job, a three-month assignment, but if they only extend my assignment without the hope of hiring me as a permanent employee in the coming months, I may go elsewhere.

Photo credit: sleboeuf (at in Kirkland, WA.

I’m getting job offers for jobs that pay more, have longer assignments, and may go permanent.

I’m making decisions based on what I think God wants me to do.  So far I think He wants me to sit tight; let it work out where I work and I may have a house to go home to sometime in the relatively short future if it all works out right!

As you may know, I have lived in my vehicle for over eight months, so I am anxious to buy a home and start living.  Just not in my van!


Have a Great Veteran’s Day

I’ve been spending time trying to get accustomed to my new job, and have been very busy with life so have neglected to write very much in this past week.

I hope you’ve been enjoying Veteran’s Day, and gave some thanks to the Veteran’s that have served to protect our country, and our citizens world-wide.

I’ll get back to it here shortly, today is a day I’ll take time for myself in.  God bless, and have a great day!

Cessationism · Christianity · Counterfeit spirits

The Word Of God Counters These Charismatic Gifts Of The Flesh With Spiritual Counterfeit Mixed In

Nathan Busenitz
Photo: Nathan Busenitz, from Grace To You on YouTube:

I’m going to focus for awhile on why the Charismatic, 3rd wave, “Continuationists” are wrong, which may make some of you upset; but I think it’s a serious enough issue that a push back of truth is needed. 

It seems like there’s a whole train of wrong thinking going on about the Apostolic gifts going on, that needs to be broken since many of those preachers have been steering new believers in the wrong direction, away from God and into the hands of satan.

Experiencing something spiritual does not mean it came from God.  Satan is the great deceiver and will take people as fools who do not rightly divide the Word of God.

that is, the one whose coming is in accord with the activity of Satan, with all power and signs and false wonders, and with all the deception of wickedness for those who perish, because they did not receive the love of the truth so as to be saved. ~ 2 Thessalonians 2:9-10 

Do you really think that satan does not also operate in the supernatural realm?  Do you think that every “spiritual experience” you have comes from God?  Please do not be foolish.  You leave yourself open to the experiences that satan wants you to have and you find yourself continually seeking those “experiences”, possibly because you think you are special, or have miraculous gifts seeking the flesh. 

These are fleshly signs that people are seeking in the realm of the spiritual.  Why are you seeking them, instead of focusing on the Words of Jesus?

You might want to grow a following, because popularity is important to you.  You may think you have to stand out from the crowd and “be special”, because you don’t feel good enough without thinking you have something special that others do not have, not quite the same as yours.  You may feel you need to be the same as all the others taking the broad highway of speaking in tongues to feel validated as a Christian.  There are many reasons people say they possess “miraculous gifts” given the Apostles, and few others in that age.

Charismatic Counterfeits: Do the Modern Gifts Meet the Biblical Standard? (Nathan Busenitz)

Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.  For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. 10 But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. ~ 1 Cor 13:8-10 

These gifts passed from the scene.  They did not return in 1901 at the outset of the Pentecostal movement as many claim (see video).  These experiences are not the same as what is described in the New Testament and we are not taught to use them or seek them; they are not in play in this age.

What were the gifts, from scripture that have ceased?  According to the video posted in this blog by Nathan Busenitz, the gifts of prophecy, of tongues and of healing are not being performed by continuationists, today.  Not how they were in the New Testament.  

These “spiritual experiences” are a corrupted counterfeit, and not the true Apostolic gifts.  

At 11:40 minutes in the video, pastor Busenitz begins to describe the true gift of prophecy, then he works his way from there.

It should be studied if you care about the bible and the True Word of God.